


To Go Home Again

by remember-gadreel (kams_log)



Series: #SundayGadreel [4]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angels, F/M, Gadreel Resurrected, Gen, Grace - Freeform, Hannah's Second Vessel, Implied Gadreel/Hannah, Redemption, SundayGadreel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-22
Updated: 2015-06-22
Packaged: 2018-04-05 13:08:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,423
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4180959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kams_log/pseuds/remember-gadreel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>#SundayGadreel Challenge.</p><p>Gadreel has been resurrected to continue in his mission to serve and protect humanity. But it's not quite the same without the support of his family in heaven, so Gadreel goes with Castiel and the Winchesters in hopes of finding out if Gadreel can ever be redeemed from his past. </p><p>But first, they will have to talk to Hannah, current leader of Heaven. If anyone will listen, maybe it will be her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Go Home Again

**Author's Note:**

> For the #SundayGadreel Challenge: "This is the worst idea you've ever had."
> 
> I hope you guys like it!

The Impala was silent as it sped down the highway. All that could be heard for the past two miles was the sound of the pattering rain outside, and the rumbling engine beneath their feet. 

Gadreel could sense the stiffness, the tension that sat between the four of them. Dean’s fingers were white and pale against the black steering wheel. Sam’s face was blank and carefully guarded, certain to keep any hidden thoughts exactly that: hidden. Castiel sat beside Gadreel in the back, his posture painfully straight and uncomfortable. His expression was not guarded like Sam’s. Gadreel didn’t even have to look at his fellow angel, or ex-angel, to know what he was thinking.

“This is the worst idea you’ve ever had,” Dean grumbled, suddenly breaking the silence. 

Gadreel only stared ahead, past his companions’ shoulders and ahead to the city in front of them. 

“Seriously, Gadreel,” Sam also chimed in, tone hesitant, “You don’t have to do this.”

“I do,” Gadreel sighed, expression firm. “I need to make what I did right.” 

“But are you sure this is the way--” Castiel tried. 

Gadreel shook his head and leaned his head back against the seat. 

“It’s worth trying.”

The car fell into silence once more, listening again to the rumbling engine the falling rain outside. 

...

The park was completely empty. At the center was a sandbox, an elaborate design making up the center. It was the portal to heaven. 

Gadreel had seen it many times before with Metatron. It was the only way in and out now, after the spell Metatron used to cast the angels down to earth. And now, it was still the only way in. But the angels had resumed control, and Hannah was currently leading the ranks. She was the first real leader they’d had since the apocalypse, and Gadreel could only hope that she would remember his sacrifice that allowed her and Castiel to stop Metatron. 

“You’re sure about this?” Dean was saying, still skeptical as the four wandered closer to the box. “What if she smites you on the spot?” 

Gadreel frowned deeply. To be honest, he hadn’t thought that far ahead. He knew that the Winchesters and Castiel were on mostly good terms with Hannah. He had very little doubt that things would end badly between them. 

But he did have doubts as to how Hannah would react to his presence. He had a very dark history close behind him, attached to his feet like a never ending shadow. Every angel would look at him in either anger or fear for what he’d done, for what he allowed to enter Eden. 

But he had to believe that there was still a chance for him. He had to believe he still had a chance for redemption. If his sacrifice in heaven meant nothing, Gadreel supposed there wouldn’t be much point in continuing. If he was still unworthy, he would allow them to lock him away. Even kill him, if it were necessary to them.

All Gadreel knew, was that he was tired of hiding from his own kind. He wanted to resume his purpose; to serve humanity and make his family proud. He couldn’t bear to live in their shame for another day.

“I’ll trust her to at least listen to my story,” Gadreel replied simply. 

Castiel nodded, but he still looked hesitant. Regardless, he called out, and a white light erupted from the sandbox. 

...

“Castiel?” Hannah asked in surprise. The four men stood in front of him, each recognizable from years past. But the one in front, the angel before him could not possibly exist. He’d seen this angel’s death with his own eyes. (Her eyes, back then. Before she revoked her original promise and took on a new male vessel.)

But the angel in front of him could not be real. He was dead. This angel had sacrificed himself to give them the proof and ability to confront Metatron. 

And now, here he stood. Alive, breathing, and wings blazing behind him.

“Gadreel,” he said, almost breathless, but shocked. “You were dead.”

“I was resurrected,” Gadreel replied simply, bowing his head respectfully. “I can only assume it was by God, or Death.”

Hannah narrowed his gaze and frowned deeply. “Why are you here?” He demanded, eyes flickering to the Winchesters and Castiel. “Why did you bring him?”

Castiel frowned back at him and took a step forward, aligning himself with Gadreel’s posture.

“Gadreel has proven to be more than his past, Hannah,” Castiel began. “He wants to redeem himself to heaven.”

Hannah raised an eyebrow, frown lessening. “When Gadreel sacrificed himself to stop Metatron, it did change a few of our brothers and sister’s perspectives. But you’re suggesting we open our arms to him and let him back in? Do you truly believe that will be accepted? That he will be accepted?”

Gadreel’s jaw tightened, and Hannah saw his grace fluctuate. It was odd, seeing him again like this. Through new eyes, but a restored body and grace. He was every bit of the warrior that was originally stationed in the garden. 

But even Hannah could see there was a weariness, a quieted and bound spirit within him. Something that naturally expected the worst, but was willing to come to heaven’s gates anyway on the slimmest chance he could be taken home.

Hannah frowned and looked to Castiel.

“This is a terrible idea.”

“I told you!” Dean exclaimed, to the immediate eye roll of his brother Sam. 

Castiel and Gadreel both looked somber. 

“You won’t let me back,” Gadreel stated, like it was a fact, a basic principle that couldn’t be ignored. Hannah watched the despondency in his grace, the settling inside him. It was gut wrenching, in a way Hannah could remember from her previous host when her husband found her. 

Hannah’s jaw tightened and he glanced back at the portal behind him. 

“Let me discuss this with the others. I won’t make this decision lightly.” 

Gadreel’s grace immediately flared, hope rekindled. Hannah wondered if he was aware of how blatantly he was showing his emotions. But then again, he was from a time before even Hannah was first created. Maybe guardianship and angels were different back then. 

It was something to consider as Castiel and the Winchesters nodded, allowing him to re-enter the portal, leaving them behind in the drizzling rain.

...

When Hannah returned, he nodded then motioned for Gadreel to come near.

Gadreel’s eyes widened in disbelief, feet unable to move from their rooted place. 

It wasn’t possible. He couldn’t possibly have made enough of any impression to be welcomed back by his brothers and sisters. He was a monster, someone who condemned all of humanity to the fall. He was the one who turned his back and let Lucifer into the garden. And yet Hannah stood before him, motioning him in with a gentle smile on his face? Gadreel thought not.

“What did they say?” He asked, hating his own fear and hesitation.

Hannah’s gaze was soft, his grace gentle, coaxing, understanding. Gadreel was afraid to trust it. 

“They will give you a chance. One chance. We will allow you to serve humanity under strict supervision. You will follow our orders, and we will guarantee your safety and mutual respect until you have proven to us that you truly are worthy of being one of us again.”

Gadreel smiled weakly, but still felt a pull of hesitation.

“But if our brothers and sisters falter, and turn on humanity like they have in the past, what then? Am I to continue following blindly, forget our true mission?”

Hannah raised an eyebrow, but his smile didn’t lessen. 

“That’s why I recommended they let you come back.”

Gadreel could feel Castiel’s smile beside him. He could also sense the distrust of the Winchesters behind him, but they could not see what Gadreel and Castiel could. 

In front of them was trust, and possible admiration. Gadreel felt himself reciprocating as he finally stepped forward.

“I will agree to the terms,” Gadreel said. “As long as our purpose is to serve and protect humanity, I will follow whatever you ask of me.”

Hannah smiled.

“Then come home, Gadreel,” he said. “We have much to do.”

Gadreel nodded and stepped forward, joining Hannah in the sand box. As the white light surrounded them, Gadreel cast one last look behind him, at the Winchesters and Castiel, who were smiling and watching him go.

He felt Hannah's hand touch his, and he smiled.

Perhaps he could be redeemed after all.

**Author's Note:**

> me: fallingforgadreel.tumblr.com


End file.
